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If you live with diabetes, chances are you鈥檝e heard it before:

鈥淪hould you be eating that?鈥�
鈥淎re you allowed cake?鈥�
鈥淚 thought people with diabetes can鈥檛 have sugar?鈥�

These comments often come up at the worst possible times鈥攂irthday parties, Christmas lunch, Easter gatherings, or when you鈥檙e simply trying to enjoy a meal out. While usually well-meaning, they can feel intrusive, judgmental, and frankly exhausting.

If you are nodding your head, you are not alone. Diabetes stigma is still very real and is an important topic for discussion.

The problem with 鈥渇ood policing鈥�

As you know, diabetes management is complex, individual, and influenced by many factors鈥攎edication, other medical conditions, activity, stress, timing, and overall eating patterns.

Yet people often reduce it to a single moment:
– one slice of cake
– one dessert
– one meal

This kind of 鈥渇ood policing鈥�:

• Oversimplifies diabetes
• Reinforces outdated myths
• Can create shame or guilt around food
• Undermines a person鈥檚 autonomy and lived experience

The reality? People with diabetes can include a wide variety of foods in their diet. What matters most is the overall pattern, not one occasion.

Special occasions are part of life

Food is more than fuel鈥攊t鈥檚 connection, culture, and celebration.

Whether it鈥檚:

• Christmas dinner with all the trimmings
• Birthday cake
• Easter chocolate
• A meal out with friends

These moments matter. Managing diabetes doesn鈥檛 mean missing out, it means making informed, flexible choices that work for you.

What to do when someone comments?

Having a few go-to responses can make these situations easier. The goal isn鈥檛 to argue, it鈥檚 to set boundaries, educate (if you want to), or simply move on.

Calm and confident

• 鈥淚鈥檝e got it under control, thanks鈥�
• 鈥淚 work this into my plan鈥�
• 鈥淚 know how this affects me鈥�

 Light but firm

• 鈥淚f I had a dollar for every time I heard that鈥︹��
• 鈥淕ood thing you鈥檙e not my dietitian!鈥�
• 鈥淚 can assure you, I鈥檝e done this before鈥�

Educational (if you feel like it)

• 鈥淧eople with diabetes can eat all kinds of foods, it鈥檚 about balance鈥�
• 鈥淚t鈥檚 not just about sugar; there鈥檚 a lot more to it鈥�
• 鈥淥ne food doesn鈥檛 define my health鈥�

Boundary-setting

• 鈥淚鈥檇 rather not talk about my food choices鈥�
• 鈥淚 appreciate your concern, but I鈥檝e got this鈥�

And sometimes, the best response is no response at all.

The bigger picture: tackling stigma

Comments like 鈥渟hould you be eating that?鈥� might seem small, but over time they contribute to:

• Feeling judged or watched
• Anxiety around eating in public
• Misunderstanding of diabetes in the wider community

Reducing stigma starts with awareness:

• Diabetes is not caused by a single food
• Management looks different for everyone
• People living with diabetes are the experts in their own care

Remember:

You don鈥檛 need to justify your food choices.
You don鈥檛 need permission to enjoy a celebration.
And you don鈥檛 need to carry the weight of other people鈥檚 misunderstandings.

By Rebecca McPhee, Accredited Practising Dietitian